Next time you’re feeling super sick from boozing it up too much, don’t bother describing your gross state with pedestrian terms like “hungover”; instead go with “crapulous.” Crapulous is defined as being “sick from excessive indulgence in liquor” and is derived from the Late Latin adjective, crapulosus.
Next time you have a real good amount of booze in your system, don’t bother saying you’re “drunk.” No way, you are “lushy.” Lushy basically means drunk, and is derived from the 19th century slang term “lush,” meaning beer or liquor.
Ever taken a drink to help you think a bit more clearly or face a day full of harsh weather? Probably not, but if you do, you can call it an “Antifogmatic,” which is a drink that’s “taken in the morning to brace oneself before going out into bad weather.”
Yeah, you or somebody you know has probably referred to getting drunk as getting “tanked,” but how about getting “tanked up”? It’s a fun twist on the semi-popular phrase, and if somebody calls you out for messing up the term, you can show them the dictionary definition of it, which is basically just “drunk.”
If you’re really, truly smashed, you can bust out with the word “Zooted.” Zooted means you’re basically toasted beyond belief, and if you’re 100% absolutely gone, you can say “I am most zooted.”
Next time you have friends over to your place to do a little drinking, don’t call it a party or get-together or kickback or anything like that. You, cultured friend, are holding a “Symposium.” Although you probably define symposium as a gathering of people to discuss a particular topic, it can also be used as a noun for drinking party. Especially one that involves music, singing, and conversation. In terms of etymology, the word originally comes from the ancient Greek sympinein, which literally meant “to drink together.”
Here’s a really useful term for which there’s really no substitute, except for maybe the word “chump.” “Shot-clog” (or “Shot-Log”), is a jerk who’s tolerated by the squad only because he or she foots the bill for the booze.
If you’re feeling just a wee bit tipsy, try describing yourself as “Jingled.” Yes, the word sounds a bit Christmas-y, but when you have the perfect little buzz going, you need a festive word to describe your mood, right?
OK, hopefully you won’t have to use this one at any point, but if you’re ever drunk and robbed by somebody, that person is a damn “Jack Roller.” According to Urban Dictionary, “Jack Roller” originated in the nineteenth and early 20th centuries in America, and came into existence because there were a lot of guys hanging around the skid row sections of big cities, beating up and robbing people who were visibly drunk.
If you’ve lost your mojo — perhaps out on the dance floor or in the middle of a lame birthday party or something else dumb — then you need a “Stiffener.” Stiffener is a slang term of the regular term, which is used to describe “secondary plates or sections which are attached to beam webs or flanges to stiffen them against out of plane deformations.”
If you’ve been drinking for a while and are little confused about what the hell is going on, feel free to say that you’re a little “Muckibus,” which is a term that means “Confused or muddled with drink.”
Here’s another term for getting super wasted, but we had to add it because, well, the word is “Splifficated” and that’s damn amazing. Splifficated just means crazy drunk, and is a fairly obscure term from The Roaring 20s.
This one sounds dirty, but you can bust out with the word “Squizzed” when you’re feeling a bit tipsy. Squizz comes from a word pulled from a particular British dialect that means “to look, [or] examine critically.” It could possibly be a blend of the words “squint,” and “quiz.” And we’ve all been kind of squinty when we’re tipsy right? Especially if there’s a quiz involved.
“Boozic” is music that sounds like it’s been written while drunk. It’s an Irish slang term, and we’re not sure if it means the music is good or bad, but we’re certain it applies to about 90% of all music in general.
Finally, we have “Bug Juice,” which is a term for inferior whiskey. It was also apparently a Disney Channel reality series that premiered in 1998, so feel free to use it in either context.
Any thoughts on these crazy-ass drinking terms? Will you be using the word “crapulous” the next time you’re feeling… crapulous? Let us know!
Featured image: HBO